A Day With Dylan

"I've been watching those bargoers for quite some time, and they just constantly kill every enemy placed before them. Even my brother fell to their might. Well, now that that pesky owl robot isn't around, and the Spy is nowhere to be seen, I think I know just the way to get them..."

The Lord of the Night's brother Dylan was pacing around a laboratory, billions of pieces of equipment scattered all over the place. Dylan didn't know what most of them did, but he knew he needed sciencey stuff to make his lair look evil. Instead it look cluttered, cataclysmic doomsday weapons buried underneath piles of fake equipment bought of con artists.

Dylan had no idea what was good and what wasn't but what he did know is that he got one machine working: a cloning machine.

"The bar has faced many foes, but they hardly remember their first real encounter with an enemy... Rise again, and kill the heroes of the King of Beasts!"

The cloning machine smoked and sputtered, a bright light shooting out of the doors as about 12 figures walked out...

"Mwahahaha! The Scullions live again!"

Zed McGlunk and his gang stumble out. The group of ruffians from Police Academy 2 were dazed and confused, a reference worthy of the new era they just stumbled into. The group looked around, and then they saw Dylan, looking as giddy as a schoolboy to see the machine worked.

"Who the hrmamramrla are you?" Zed stutters out.

"I, my friend, am the greatest evil mind to ever live! Dylan! I have brought you to life for one purpose: to defeat the King of Beasts!"

"Hmm, this.... KING OF BEASTS, sounds like a tough jerk!" the gangs leader says with shifting inflections.

"Don't worry, they will never expect you! You have the element of surprise!"

Dylan guided the group over to a van.

"Now then, I will drive you to the bar, where you must smash up the place! Break their windows! CLOG THEIR TOILETS!! HA HA HA HA HA!!! THEY WILL HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO DO-"

The sound of wheels screeching interrupts Dylan. The group had climbed into the car and drove off, going anywhere BUT the bar to wreck things up and steal about 8 dollars from a cash register.

Dylan's head dropped, the dejected brother of the Lord stumbling back into his untidy lair. Suddenly though, his face perked up!

"I shall not give up yet!  I have the perfect plan! With enough Tapogres, I can eventually fill the bar with so many corpses they will have no choice but to leave it, separating the group to be picked off by..."

Dylan rambled on into the night, getting ready to enact another scheme that would never get past phase 1.