City of Beasts Pt.2: Tapogres

When you live in a city full of murderous machines, mutants, monsters, marines, and mafiosos, beer is a high commodity. People would do anything to briefly forget the terrible world around them, and alcohol provided that comfort to those who could get their hand on it. The bar squid's drinks provided brief sustenance, but as the recipes and ingredients were exhausted, people became desperate for a drink. Even the hardest rivals were willing to briefly work together if it meant that they would be able to get their hands on the scarce amber liquid.

Unfortunately for a young naive Tapogre, this booze trade made him incredibly valuable. Yquem, a young tapogre with wine for blood, was prized for his high class flavor and constant ability to supply it. Although only subpar amounts could be extracted at a time, the refractory period was short enough to warrant a highly monitored trade on the tapogre himself.

Yquem was at first tortured to provide his precious lifeblood, but after a while he learned that his lot in life was to provide the gangs of the city with their juice. Yquem was currently in the hands of the Triden gang, and the red liquid provided their beverages the air of class they futilely tried to imitate. However, the Family had dipped into their mass of riches in order to acquire the wine fountain that is the young tapir. Their penchant for Italian ways often hurt their finances, but they had enough to warrant purchasing the closest thing they could get to the wine of the Old Country.

In transport, the Triden family's goons actively harassed the poor Tapogre, trying to get a few last spurts of wine from his bottle-arms. However, their dilly-dallying proved to be their downfall. A bullet sailed through the air and took down one thug, and as the others fumbled with their weapons to try and fire on the unseen sharpshooter, they were all picked off. Yquem stood alone in the street, and as the sniper loaded another bullet to take down the Tapogre too, a familiar nuisance blocked his view. A shower of flyers were sprayed all over the streets obscuring his aim and allowing the Tapogre to escape. The sniper aimed his gun and fired at the sky, trying to hit the one who had dropped the flyers for Yahoo.com.

Yquem stumbled through the city, running the only place he knew he could hide.Far off he could hear the rumblings of two titans fighting in the street, and his fear for his life made him lose his way. It wasn't until nightfall that the Tapogre was able to locate the path to his destination, the only safehouse for Tapogres in the City of Beasts: The Church of Tapogrepogo.

In concept, the City of Beasts was a perfect place for the violent race of tapir-ogre mutants. However, they quickly realized they were outmatched, and even though they wandered the streets still, they knew their lives could end for any reason at any second. The city was ruthless, and they lacked the wits to match their brawn. Tapogres died left and right, and few were able to get the food they needed to survive. That's where the church came in. Unknown to most other denizens of the city, the church was a safe place where Tapogres could sleep for the night and find allies for hunts for human flesh. Pornogres provided them outlets for their carnal desires, and the priests were always encouraging them to have hope.

Yquem approached the church in the dark, and noticed the first of many defense mechanisms. It was simple, meant to inspire fear and teach possible intruders of their fate. Bodies hung from street lamps and makeshift pikes. Some were humans, while others were Tapogres themselves. Dissenters, moles, and spies were ratted out and killed. One looked familiar to Yquem. It was Seo, an old Tapogre acquitance who had told him about the church. However, Seo had been augmented with some sort of machinery, and he must have been executed for suspicion of being a spy for the machines.

As he got closer, he found a short tunnel tipped with razors that led to the church's entrance. Tapogres had many things to fear in the city, but no one was feared more among the race than a certain Tapogre that had taken it upon himself to rig their bodies with phishing lines that allowed him to control their every move. The tunnel was meant to sever any lines that were hooked into a Tapogre or that tried to infiltrate the church's interior. The Tapogres had no idea if it worked, but they attributed the lack of infiltration so far as a sign of its effectiveness.

Yquem had almost reached the door when he was startled by a sudden snarling. The church's last line defense sat by the door in a wooden house. The creature growled at Yquem, but it did not lunge forward. Its uncanny sense of smell allowed it to differentiate between real and fake Tapogres, and its razor sharp teeth made quick work of anyone foolish enough to try to impersonate the mutant tapirs.

Yquem struggled with his bottled hands to grasp the door handles, but when he got it open, he was treated to a sight. Tapogres sat all over the church. all preparing for sleep. A few were busy preparing a few murdered men for a late dinner, and at the altar a few were even praying. On the altar sat a rotting head of a Tapogre, believed to belong to the fabled Tapogrepogo the church had been named after. It was believed by the priests that a unity among Tapogres could lead to the resurrection of the Fallen Saviour. The priests often had little to back up the validity of Tapogrepogo's supposed strength, but when the last Tapogre prophet had lost his life for the cause, few questioned its validity anymore.

On a crucifix above the congregation sat the Fallen Prophet. Although he never claimed to be a Messiah for the Fallen Saviour, the priests were quick to label him one. The humble foreman had sought unity in the city between not only Tapogres but the many races. Unfortunately, his upbeat attitude was his downfall. There was no room for heroes in a city of villains. However, his martyrdom led to the developing unity of the Tapogres, and at least his memory gave them hope for tomorrow.

One of the priests approached Yquem and welcomed him. Yquem had never seen the priests and never had heard them described either, so he was very startled to find they were a trio of cats made of custard. The cat guided him over to an area where other Tapogres sat, some seeming as fresh to the church as he was. One of them had four arms, and was busy picking at the remains of what seemed like golden armor. It was clear he had been mugged, and although he was quite muscular, the wake-up call about his strength must have drove him to the church.

Another kitten tended to the wounds he had received while in transit to the Family while the other went off to perform some other business. The last priest was preparing to give the last sermon of the night before lights-out. This cat looked different than the others. It was obvious he had been through some sort of trauma, and it was later revealed to be have been caused by a bad deal with a jewel fencer over an ark for carrying the Fallen Saviour's head around in. The priest was rather flat and cracked, apparently saved only by flash freezing. His sermons were often punctuated with stuttering, gulping, and a hacking cough, but his ability to inspire the Tapogres was the greatest of the three.

As Yquem went to sleep that night in a cot he had to share with a young Tapogress with pigtails, he finally felt content. His life here had been rough, but after living through all the brutality, he was finally able to find a place he could call home.

My new RP character for the next tournament

I'm going to RP as the entire state of North Dakota. Like, the whole damn thing, the entire fucking land mass is going to walk in the bar and drink some booze and vote and shit.

It's going to be so damn rad.

City of Beasts Pt.1: Jumpropeman

"Back of man, I don't want no part of your stupid group!" Keahi screamed. Two relatively well dressed men were chasing after the young Hawaiian with guns at the ready. Neither fired yet.

"It's for your own good kid! You won't last long in the city on your own!" The two men were not the best recruiters, but they would do anything to please their new Mother.

Keahi ran out of the dark alley and into the street, forgetting the dangers of being out in the open in the City of Beasts.  The two men continued pursuing him, but soon the young Hawaiian's stamina allowed him to escape their sights. The two men in suits stopped to catch their breaths.

"God damn, we haven't been able to get one guy to join the Family."

"Well, I've started to think about that, and I think it might be because we run after them with guns pointed at their backs..."

The two men squabbled over what to do next. They were never the brightest criminals, and this lack of brightness made them easily miss the odd distortion of time and space making its way towards them.

The few doors and windows that still could close slammed shut as an aura of warped aura approached the two suited fellows. Heavy footsteps become apparent, and large chunks of road floated up into the air and stayed in place. By the time the men realized what was going on, it was too late to run.

Massive two-dimensional fangs crushed the men and quickly turned the meat into fragments. The beast swallowed its meal and let out a loud "OROAAR!R!"

Lion Jeff continued stalking the streets, a force to be reckoned with if there ever was one. It only sought meals to sustain itself, so those smart enough to notice the distortions were quick to make themselves scarce during its approach. Many had tried foolishly to kill it, but it never seemed to ever stay dead.

On its back lounged its owner, a being who contributed to the distortions with his newfound disregard for his duties. The Jingle Specter had been trapped in an everlasting ennui since entering the City of Beasts, and the fabric of time felt the impact of his inaction. His lack of timekeeping coupled with Lion Jeff's JPEG aura made the city treat them more as a natural disaster than anything.

The buildings-tall feline continued stalking the streets, hoping to find more foolish men who would not notice its obvious approach. Soon, an older gentleman caught its eye. It ran towards him eagerly, but soon the man called out.

"Call off your abomination, Jumpropeman."

The calm voice was familiar to the ghost, and Jumpropeman quickly slowed his mount down with a ring of a bell. "Is that you, Q? I thought Optimus and his raggamuffins killed you."

"Lazy wit as always, Jumpropeman, but I was never killed. Technology needs doctors too, I was lucky I got away when I did though."

Q's body was scarred and battered, and it was apparent that the man had to steal some limbs from his robot captors to replace his own when he escaped.

"What do you want old man? Jeff's gotta eat."

"Your stupid pet can wait. You screwed me over when you sold me out to the Autobot!"

"Hey, I was looking for thrills. Sadly, haven't found any in this whole damn place."

Q scowled at the emotionless ghost but quickly regained his composure.

"You are going to pay now! I got a hold of a little something while I was gone..."

In Q's hand was a vial of green Mutagen, and it was clear some had already been used.

"Jumpropeman, I would like you to meet Bond."

An angry groan rattled through the street as a nearby building caved in. A giant beast came charging after hearing its call. Jumpropeman looked at the newly arrived creature and yawned.

"A monstrous James Bond, how quaint."

The super spy had lost all of his charm after the mutagen mutated him into a behemoth. Muscles bulged irregularly and veins pulsed and popped. The hulking menace stood next to Q, awkwardly trying to keep its imbalanced body on two legs.

Jeff roared at the new monstrosity, and James was quick to moan back. Before either Q or JRM could order them to, both monsters lurched forward and began to tear each other apart.

Q cheered for his manufactured monster, but Jumpropeman still sat on his beast's back, utterly bored by the whole affair.

(Pt.2 coming soon. By the way, I consider Fumes and Midori as portrayed in the other City of Beasts stories canon for mine. I will, however, do all my other characters, so expect many parts!!)

Monster Collector

So, it's been a while since I told JRM's story, and although I intended to quickly write the origins of Tut-Tut and such, I ended up getting sick on the Thursday I was going to. On the bright side, I got Kirby Mass Attack and have finished Kirby's Return to Dreamland, but not the Extra mode yet.

The thing about those games are, the collectibles are more of a nuisance than anything. I want to enjoy the levels and powers and such in Return to Dreamland, but I'm too busy looking for gears. Kirby Mass Attack has the same issue with medals, just feels like a bunch of item hunting. However, Kirby Mass Attack also feels a bit like a chore. I don't like games where I only have a bit of control over my character and I get punished when the AI decides to be stupid. It's definitely the worst main series Kirby game I've played, and its minigames outshine its actual gameplay. Kirby Quest would be lots of fun if expanded, and Kirby Brawlball would be fun as its own game.

Kirby's Dreamland 3, Kirby 64, Kirby Super Star, all extended play time through either non-distracting collectibles and sidequests or cool new things to do.

So, back to what this is supposed to be about. I said I would explain Tut-Tut, the Snappers, and the concept of being a Time Spirit. To understand those guys, we must go back to a young boy who recently discovered Pokemon and was feeling creative.

I doodled strange creatures a lot, but when I found out about Pokemon, I felt compelled to compile them into one collective group and make a world around them. So, I created something called Monster Collector. In it, the Mons, called simply Monsters, are tamed with hand lasers and pitted against each other in combat a lot less restrictive than four move Pokemon battles. The thing took place in Other World, and it was pretty much a reworked Pokemon idea, but the monsters were not ripoffs at least!

So, this young me drew up tons of characters, all still sitting on papers in my room. Tut-Tut was actually part of the first group, as were the Snappers and the Time Spirit.

Remember him from like, one post?

Anyways, those guys were some of the first and thus pretty important to the formation of the whole thing, and also stuck in my memory pretty well. Come Zoofights time and the Big Bar Brawl, ideas began brewing in my head. The cameras were important, so I decided to bring the Snappers out and have them be the cameras with personality! The characters you see are actually called Snaps, with Snappers being weird camera creatures with tongues and slits for eyes. The name was just better so I transplanted the name to the cuter character. Snapper was whipped up with MSPaint and a camera taken from google image search so that he looked nice. The original image of him was a sketch with no color. None of the Monster were colored.

So those are the Snappers, now why did I rope in Tut-Tut? Well, originally I wanted some sort of commenter for the Big Bar Brawl, to lay out proceedings or something like that. I had to pick someone simple in appearance because I was off at University so scanning was not a choice, so I picked two guys. Tut-Tut and Herc. Herc was pretty much a ragdoll with dreams of grandeur and an inflated ego, but he never got implemented because Tut-tut alone seemed a better idea. Drawing Tut-Tut's basic shape over some ancient looking GIS image made the mummy you all know and love.

Now, we have the Time Spirit and the concept of the spirits. Monster Collector's Other World was ruled by spirits who made the world and maintained it, lacking power in our world but responsible for the creation of the alternate version. There are many spirits, those who create, and those who destroy. Most helpful spirits are simple like the Time Spirit, but their leader, mentioned casually by JRM when talking to those Gods from Alex's RPing, is the Ultra Spirit. He is really a sight to behold, a mishmash of bodies and appearances. He is the spirit of spirits and pretty much the final boss of Monster Collector. The Destroyers are actually pretty cool and you may one day see some, but at the moment, only the Time Spirit has been seen. The similarity between JRM and the Time Spirit led to their connection, and again the simple design made it easy to whip him up on the computer quickly for RP purposes.

Well, I think those have been explained well enough, unless I left some things out without noticing. Hope these were interesting despite having less substances. Their personalities are purely Zoofights creations, and although I have no other real OCs left to explain, I may ramble about other things Zoofights related in later posts. No promises though, unless I tempt fate to make me sick again